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Almost Pulling
Curious if this is considered trich. At the crown of my head, the hair that grows there is almost a completely different texture than the rest of my hair. There are lots of very course, super thick , crinkly hairs In that section. Additionally the roots in only that section are painful if you are touching the hairs and sometimes the scalp. I am addicted to playing with these hairs, running my nails over the crinkles (in a kind of attempt to smooth them out, which sometimes works but sometimes causes a break) but also feeling the pain at the roots when I’m playing. I don’t actually want to pull the hair out (maybe I do, I’m just scared of hair loss so I don’t) but once in a while one will come out. I really just like examining the hair if it falls out and that’s it. I’m slightly worried this will eventually turn into full on pulling, though I've been doing this on and off for years and it’s not progressed. Lately it’s happening much more, I assume because I’ve dealt with a ton of stressful events recently. I’m mostly worried that all this activity to those hair follicles will eventually cause the hair to fall out on its own sooner than the normal hair cycle and I’ll be left with a bald spot. Any thoughts?
Your situation is EXACTLY how my hair pulling started 9 years ago and now I am almost BALD!! It was after a new salon damaged some chunks of hair doing a bad job of highlights, making them feel coarse and crinkly. The hairs on the crown of my head seemed the worst so I started pulling them out. Several people advised me to stop but I didn't. Then I started searching my whole head for 'bad', rough hairs. After I pulled each strand I would study it for several seconds. Sometimes I even saved and labelled the most crinkly ones! Crazy right? Plus I was a 45 year old professional engineer at the time so I should have considered the consequences more. Eventually I got to the point where pulling ANY strand of hair, consciously and unconsciously, felt desirable in some way. I have had a ton of stress over those years, with 2 kids and a terminal cancer diagnosis (I am refusing to die) so my family doesn't bug me about it, but I can't leave the house without a hat and it makes me feel bad about myself. So 9 years ago I had a beautiful, thick head of hair and now it is almost all gone, most permanently! I really wish I had just left those crinkly hairs alone and hope you manage to ignore them too!
Wishing you the best of luck and success.