Hair pulling alongside alopecea

Hi, im really struggling to calm my hair pulling
. This originally started in 1993. Usually starts with top crown of head and then onto sides behind ears. I had a baby 6 months ago that has triggered stress alopecea where my hair is thinning out all over rather than one specific area. Where over the years ive managed to try and hide this condition, its now becoming visually obvious. Selecting particular hairs. If theres a split end, a strand thats darker than another, a different thickness if that makes sense. Back of head. Its about the feeling to pull what feels like a random out of place hair. Im also plucking with tweezers my private region (sorry) at least thats hidden. Ive spoken to doctors that basically laughed it off and told me to stop. Its frustrating, now doing it whilst driving etc. Im so embarrassed and cant find support. Constantly have hair on carpets, clothes, presuming this is triggering my alopecea. I just need to vent as ive kept this hush for so long. Previously used excuse when asked that id got hair caught on something. Thats not a valid excuse as regrowth isnt at the same time. Bits of sticky up hair. I tie my hair up then go for new hairs growing. Its getting more frequent. Now tied up you can see a bald patch on crown. I cant stop :(